Too Many Roles

I feel like a stay-at-home mom.

Except I'm not married and I don't have kids.


You may have gone back and re-read that statement. And you still don't understand. Allow me to explain.
I have been out of class since 11:00 AM and had planned to spend the rest of the day (until practice at 4:00 PM, that is) doing homework for the classes I have lately been daydreaming through. I know nothing about what's going on in Finance, Accounting, Marketing, and Risk Management....

But I had to stall this self-tutoring in order to run to the mall to pick up a birthday present for a friend. And then run a few more errands. At the mall, I saw many a stay-at-home mom in sweatpants, t-shirts, and pony tails pushing strollers around the mall. They were giving me funny looks like, "Aren't you supposed to be in school? It's 11:30 in the morning." (Remember that I was asked multiple times this summer if I was 15 or 16. So I assume they assumed I was in high school.) Either way, I felt really out of place, even though I was very well-groomed (which is rare for a rower, mind you. We're always too exhausted to care about our appearance).

Anyway, after scurrying around the mall during "mom" hours and not "college kid" or "high schooler" hours, I had to run over to Target to pick up a few more things. It was pretty much the same thing over there--moms with babies picking up the same items I was: birthday cards, shampoo, workout clothes, make-up, etc.

Then, I came home and noticed that there were a few chores to do around the apartment. Nothing that should take too long and I could certainly leave a few for my roommates to do. That's only fair, after all. But, no. I immediately turned into a germophobe-mom-clean freak who couldn't leave one square inch of the bathroom, shower, kitchen, living room, etc, with an ounce of dirt or clutter on it. After a few hours of coming out of my self-induced neat freak coma, I realized the whole day was almost gone. And that I will just have to spend my Thursday evening studying for all of my classes.

It was then that I started to see a trend.

I'm being too responsible.

I'm taking 15 hours of course load this semester, have a Risk Management and Insurance internship, am the secretary for the Student-Athlete Advisory Committee, practice 20 hours a week for rowing, and just took on a weekly babysitting job. Like a stay-at-home mom, I have started to assume that I need to do everything by myself and that no one is qualified to help me. Which is a recipe for disaster.

By being at the mall during the day, I realized I'm beginning to lose focus on what I'm actually here to do: go to school and row. That's it. All of the extra things I've added to my life will look great on a resume, but will they help me lead a happy and healthy life? Or will I constantly be overwhelmed on a day-to-day basis by everything I've added to my schedule?

I'm supposed to just be a college kid who has fun and works hard at school. Instead, I have assumed the roles of athlete, nanny, student, business person, and board member. The problem is: I want to be all of these things. I guess I'll just have to figure out how to make them all work without digging myself into a hole.

Now, how do I get rid of this shovel?