So much has yet to happen, I can't even tell you. Mostly because I have no freaking clue what is going on.
In about a month, my rowing career will be over. The sport I have known, loved, and competed in for 8 years, will forever change. Sure, I'll row recreationally when I'm out of college. But it will never, ever, ever be the same. You can never go back to being a D1 athlete. I have mixed emotions about it. Like, I think I'm sooo sick of getting up at 4:50 am, but then I remember I'm psycho enough that I do that in the summer to go running before work. I'll miss my teammates incredibly, but not so much in the spring time when all of us 40 girls are together 30+ hours a week and we start to go a little stir crazy. I'll miss the workouts, but I'm pretty sure they are ingrained into my memory for all of eternity and I will do them once I graduate. IT'S JUST SO WEIRD. I remember being recruited by SMU and going to college to row and what a whirlwind that was and now it's just....over.
I also don't have a job. I've been on about 198428012 interviews and I'm extremely impressive on paper (I'm not bragging here, I'm dead serious. I've been working my tail off for the past 4 years. I did not have a normal college experience). But when it comes to getting the job, I come up short. I always find one little thing about a job I don't like and that takes it off my list or I subconsciously blow the interview at the end. One employer gave me feedback on my interview that I was, "very impressive and put together, but they just didn't get a sense that I was serious about starting a career." Hmmm....there may be something to this. After all, I have been planning a Eurotrip for the summer and part of me wonders what it would be like to buy a one-way ticket. I'm a bit adventurous like that, you know. One of my friends here (a few years older) went over to visit Scotland and ended up staying for 2 years. Doesn't sound to bad.
Which brings me to: I'm homeless. Well, not really. Starting in June, I won't have a pay check because I currently don't have a job lined up, don't have a future (yet), don't know what city I'll be living in, and so I can't even start looking at apartments until I know what city I'm even living in. And I can't look for a apartment until I know what I can afford which I won't know until I have a pay check and I won't have a pay check until I have a job.
So there you have it. I either need a job or to move to Europe. Or I'll be homeless.
